Archive for April 23rd, 2007

Today my Benjamin is 2 weeks and five days old.

Already he has changed. I would say he has probably gained about a pound and a half… and he is beginning to look more and more (with each passing day) just like his brothers – a perfect combination in fact!

As I look at my three boys… I can’t help but try and see into the future. It cracks me up to “see” these three (handsome!) men someday sitting around the dining room table telling me about their day. Okay – maybe I’m stretching it there – but I really do get such a “high” off of daydreaming about these 3 little boys turning into men. I see us laughing and joking… I see them making fun of me (as children do to their parents, let’s face it!)… I see them wrestling with each other… and them harrassing each other about girls they like and things that they do! I see homework thrown on the table and books piled high in their rooms. I see baseball gloves and football helmets and the occasional tennis ball I will trip over! I see laundry all over bedrooms and drawers half open.

And I honestly think – while I’m thinking ALL of this – I love this!

I don’t know if every mom does this… but I often wonder if one will be more shy… and who will it be? If one will be my “party animal”… and who will it be? If one will be a “ladies man”… and who will it be? Who will I “worry” the most about… who will be my little love bug…?? The list goes on and on.

I laugh to think that they will all be a grade apart from each other in school. And I even cringe at the same time!

I think about the women they will bring home. And I pray they marry women whom I absolutely adore… although, we all know (as moms) we can never guarantee that…! But I hope, and that hope will go a long way, right!?

And I think about what they will become. The friendships they will make. The bonds they will have as brothers. The women who may break their hearts. The hearts they may break. The songs we will dance to together… yes, as “crazy” as this sounds, I already have my wedding song picked out for them…

William – Ring of Fire
Alexander – Sweet Home Alabama
Benjamin – Possibly… The Riddle

And I think about how my relationship with them will be. I WANT to be their friend AND their mother. I want them to respect me and trust me and love me more than anything. I want them to know that I will always be in their court, no matter what. I want them to feel what I felt as a child growing up – that safety of unconditional love. The kind of love that never ever goes away… and you, the child, knows it.

And yes… all this goes through my mind… even as they are as young as 2 1/2, 1 1/2 and 2 weeks, 5 days old.

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