I didn’t want to fall in love with Seth.
I must admit, I tried very hard not to. I just couldn’t imagine opening my heart up again, knowing how much it hurts when it breaks.
It was a tough summer. Tough, actually, doesn’t even come close to describing it.
Discovering that our beloved 5-year-old big boy, Bismarck, had terminal cancer, and then losing him 8 short weeks later was thoroughly, completely and simply devastating for me, Steve and Ryder – and for our whole extended family, as well.
People would ask Steve and I if we were going to get another dog, but we couldn’t even think about trying to “replace” Bizzy. We decided that we would be a one dog family with our little baby girl Ryder.
Bizzy and Rydie had such a unique brother-sister relationship. They were best friends. Bizzy was such a protective big brother to Ryder, and never let another dog approach her without first scoping out the situation for himself. And Rydie looked up to her big brother so much, and learned so many things from him, like playing bally. We just couldn’t imagine bringing another dog into the family and confusing Ryder (yes, dogs come first in our family).
A little over a month after we lost Bismarck, we found out through Defenders of Animals that a 7-year-old lab mix named Seth needed a foster home. His family was moving and couldn’t take him.
Steve and I discussed it, and thought that fostering Seth would work out nicely. We weren’t ready to commit to adopting a new dog yet, but we would be happy about helping out another dog temporarily.
And that’s the mentality I tried to keep once we took Seth into our home. I gave him love, I paid lots of attention to him, I took him on walks and played with him… but I tried to keep myself from getting too attached.
Of course, Seth had a different plan. And I believe that Bismarck played a big part in that plan.
Ever since we lost Bizzy, I’ve asked him to send me signs that he is OK. I really do talk to him every day. And he has always given me those signs… the whisper in the wind, the sunshine in my hair. And I also believe that when I see sunflowers, that’s Bizzy saying, “Hi Mama! I’m with you!”
But I have also come to believe that Bizzy sent Seth to us.
Seth has so many characteristics that remind me of Bismarck. He loves affection. He love walks. He loves to snuggle on the couch – and snore. He sniffs food thoroughly before deciding to eat. He likes to tease Ryder by taking her toys. It’s almost like Bizzy knew that Seth would constantly be reminding us of him.
And Ryder and Seth have even developed their own unique relationship together. Different from the relationship that Ryder and Bismarck shared, but special all the same.
We have all fallen in love with Seth. And yes, he is now part of the family.
Yesterday Mom and I were out shopping and I spotted a greeting card with a huge sunflower on the front. I went over to the card and opened it. Inside it read simply: Thank you so very much
Was it Bizzy thanking me for being his Mama? Bizzy thanking me for embracing Seth?
Maybe a bit of both.
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